4 common mistakes parents make with baby sleep—and how to avoid them
Let’s face it—sleep is one of the most challenging parts of parenting, and when things don’t go smoothly, it’s easy to feel like you’re doing something wrong. But here’s the truth: struggling with your child’s sleep is incredibly common, and you’re not alone.
Every baby is unique, and even the best-intentioned parents can run into roadblocks when trying to improve their little one’s sleep. If you’ve found yourself googling “how to get my baby to sleep” at 2 a.m. or feeling like nothing you try works, you’re not alone—and you’re not failing.
In my work with countless families, I’ve noticed some recurring themes when it comes to the mistakes parents often make while trying to improve their baby’s sleep. The good news? These mistakes are easy to fix once you know what’s holding you back.
In this blog, I’ll explore four common baby sleep mistakes and offer simple, practical solutions to help you and your baby get the rest you deserve.
Mistake #1: Googling for answers that aren’t tailored to your child
Why it’s a problem
Let’s be honest: Google is a lifesaver for parents in many ways. Whether you’re looking up recipes for homemade baby food or trying to decode a rash, it’s the first place many of us turn. But when it comes to baby sleep, relying on internet advice can sometimes do more harm than good.
Why? Because most advice you find online isn’t tailored to your baby’s unique needs. What works for one child might not work for another. Your baby’s temperament, age, developmental stage, and even their daily routine can all impact how they respond to different sleep strategies. Trying a generic “fix” from the internet often leads to frustration when it doesn’t produce results—or worse, leaves you feeling like you’re doing something wrong.
What to do instead
Take a step back from the internet rabbit hole and focus on your baby’s specific needs. Start by considering factors like:
How old is your baby?
Do they struggle more with naps or nighttime sleep?
Are they going through a developmental leap or teething?
What’s their temperament—do they need extra soothing, or are they fairly adaptable?
If you’re not sure where to start, consulting a pediatric sleep consultant can make all the difference. A professional can help you create a customized sleep plan that works for your family, saving you time, stress, and countless late-night Google searches. That personal touch of being able to talk to a real human and get insights into your specific questions can make a world of a difference.
Mistake #2: Thinking your child won’t respond to changes
Why it’s a problem
When you’re sleep-deprived and feeling defeated, it’s easy to believe that your baby is just a “bad sleeper” or that nothing will ever work for them. Maybe you’ve tried sleep training before, but it didn’t stick. Or perhaps every time you start a new routine, it feels like something (a cold, teething, a vacation) throws you off track.
This mindset can be one of the biggest obstacles to improving your baby’s sleep. When you believe your child won’t respond to changes, it’s tempting to give up or avoid trying new strategies altogether.
What to do instead
The truth is, all children are capable of learning new sleep habits with the right approach and consistency. Even if previous attempts didn’t yield results, that doesn’t mean your baby can’t make progress—it just means you might need to try a different strategy or give it more time. Your baby is more capable than you realize.
Here are some ways to shift your mindset and take action:
Start small. Focus on manageable changes, like adjusting bedtime by 15 minutes or introducing a calming pre-sleep routine.
Be patient. It can take time for babies to adjust to new habits. Stick with your chosen strategy for at least a week before deciding whether you’re seeing signs of improvement or not.
Look for the “wins.” Progress doesn’t always happen overnight, but small victories—like an extra hour of sleep or fewer wakings—are signs that things are moving in the right direction.
Remember, babies are remarkably adaptable. With patience, consistency, and the right support, even the most challenging sleep patterns can improve.
Mistake #3: Trying too many strategies at once
Why it’s a problem
When sleep is a struggle, it’s tempting to try every tip, trick, and method you come across. One night you’re rocking your baby to sleep; the next, you’re trying a version of the Ferber method, and then before you know it you’re attempting to put down drowsy but awake. But constantly changing your approach can create more confusion—for both you and your baby.
Without a clear plan, it’s difficult to track what’s working and what’s not. Your baby may also struggle to understand what’s expected of them if the “rules” keep changing. Changing sleep habits won’t work if your baby can’t figure out what habits you’re trying to get rid of and what habits you’re trying to get to stick.
What to do instead
The key to success is consistency. Choose one strategy, and commit to it for at least 1-2 weeks before making adjustments. This gives your baby time to learn and adapt to the new routine.
Here’s how to create a clear, effective plan
Choose a method that aligns with your parenting style- For example, if you’re not comfortable with crying, you can opt for a gentle approach like the chair method or gradual sleep coaching so that you’ll be very present as your baby cries about the change.
Set realistic goals- Instead of expecting your baby to sleep through the night right away, focus on smaller milestones, like reducing the number of night wakings, having an easier time getting them back to sleep each waking or establishing a consistent bedtime.
Track progress- Keep a sleep log to monitor your baby’s patterns. This can help you identify trends and make informed decisions about whether to tweak your approach. It also can help you notice small improvements along the way- even if it doesn’t feel like your baby is improving.
If you’re unsure which strategy to choose, working with a sleep consultant can provide clarity and guidance, helping you craft a plan that’s realistic and effective.
Mistake #4: Thinking you have to do it alone
Why it’s a problem
Parenting can be isolating, especially when you’re dealing with sleep challenges. Many parents feel like they need to “figure it out” on their own, but the truth is, there’s no shame in asking for help. Sleep struggles aren’t a reflection of your parenting abilities—they’re a normal part of the journey.
Trying to tackle sleep issues without support can lead to burnout, frustration, and unnecessary guilt. And when you’re exhausted, it’s even harder to stay consistent with any plan you put in place.
What to do instead
Lean on your support system, whether that’s your partner, family, friends, or a professional sleep consultant. Here are some ways to build a network of support:
Tag-team with your partner- Divide and conquer bedtime duties, or take turns handling night wakings so both of you can get some rest. Make sure you are both on the same page so you can both be responding consistently. I always recommend to my clients that they have a nightly chat before heading to bed themselves. They can use this quick catch up to get on the same page about how they are planning to handle night wakings and feedings that night as well as making sure both parents are divvying up the workload.
Reach out to friends or family- Don’t be afraid to ask for help—whether it’s someone watching the baby for an hour while you nap or simply offering a listening ear. If you have a friend who’s been through the sleep training process before, ask them to come and support you the first night or two if they feel comfortable.
Consult a professional- A sleep consultant can provide expert advice tailored to your child’s needs, giving you the tools and confidence to tackle sleep challenges head-on. When I work with families, I get to know their unique situation and goals so that I can be as effective as possible when they are struggling and give them tips specifically for them.
Remember, asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign that you’re doing everything you can to support your baby’s well-being.
Final thoughts
If you recognize yourself in any of these common mistakes, take heart—you’re not alone, and the fact that you’re reading this shows you’re already taking steps in the right direction. Improving your baby’s sleep is a journey, and like any journey, it comes with twists, turns, and a few detours along the way.
The good news? With the right tools, support, and mindset, restful nights are within reach. If you feel stuck or overwhelmed, I’d love to help. Book a free 15 minute call with me, and you can share your sleep situation with me and we’ll decide if we’d make a good fit to work together!
You don’t have to navigate this journey alone—let’s work together to help your family get the rest you deserve.
