Why is my newborn so restless? A guide to active sleep
If you’ve ever watched your newborn sleep and wondered why they seem so restless, you’re not alone! One minute they’re peaceful, and the next, they’re twitching, grunting, or even moving their arms and legs. It can be confusing for new parents who expect sleep to look calm and still. But here’s the thing—your baby’s restlessness is often part of something called active sleep, a crucial part of their development.
In fact, newborns spend a significant amount of their sleep in this active state, and it’s perfectly normal. But what exactly is active sleep, and how can you tell when your baby is experiencing it versus waking up? More importantly, should you intervene when they seem fidgety, or is it better to let them be?
In this guide, we’ll break down everything you need to know about active sleep, from recognizing the signs to understanding why it’s so important for your newborn’s growth. By the end, you’ll feel more confident in navigating your baby’s unique sleep patterns.
What is active sleep?
Your newborns sleep cycles are unique in that they are made up of just 2 different stages. One stage is what we call REM sleep (also known as active sleep) and the other stage is what we call non-REM sleep (also known as quiet sleep). When your newborn gets closer to the 4 month mark, these sleep cycles and stages will change (more about that here) but for now, this is what their sleep is supposed to be like.
Quiet sleep is the part of their sleep that is meant to be deeper. This is when they will be peacefully sleeping, still, and quiet. You’ll notice that their breathing will be regular and deep. If you’ve ever tried to wake your newborn up and had a really hard time, it was probably because they were in the quiet stage of sleep. It can be a lot harder to wake a newborn up when they are in their quiet stage of sleep.
Signs of active sleep in newborns
Newborn REM sleep is not exactly like adult REM sleep. When adults are in their stage of REM sleep, their bodies are paralyzed so they don’t move all around the bed while dreaming. However, newborns are not paralyzed during their REM, or active, sleep.
When your newborn is asleep but in the active stage of sleep, you may notice that they:
Are twitching, moving, and stretching while still asleep
Making noises like grunting, moaning, fussing, or whimpering
You may notice that their breathing is not as deep and regular as it was during the quiet stage of sleep
You may worry or feel like they are trying to break out of their swaddle because of the movements they are making
Your newborn may even cry for short bursts of time while in active sleep. This crying will not escalate or last long though
Their eyes may flutter open here or there but for the most part they will remain closed (hint: this is how you know they are actually asleep and not awake yet!)
While all these things are happening, your newborn will still firmly be asleep. Kind of crazy isn’t it?
Why is active sleep important?
As frustrating as this active stage of sleep can be for new parents, it does serve a purpose. Active sleep is an important part of your newborn’s sleep and just because they seem restless, that doesn’t mean they aren’t getting benefits from this stage of sleep. During active sleep, the brain is busy processing information and building neural connections that help with memory, learning, and sensory development. This stage of sleep also stimulates the nervous system, which is essential for healthy brain maturation.
Newborns spend a significant amount of time in active sleep because their brains are rapidly developing in the early weeks of life. This type of sleep helps lay the foundation for motor skills, cognitive abilities, and emotional regulation as they grow.
How long do newborns spend in active sleep?
Your newborn’s sleep is typically split 50/50. 50% of their sleep is quiet sleep and 50% of their sleep is active sleep. The average newborn sleep cycle is around 45 minutes so roughly half of that time each sleep cycle is delegated to active REM sleep.
When your newborn hits their 4 month sleep regression, that will mark a change in their sleep cycles. REM sleep will become 1 of 5 stages instead of 1 of only 2 stages of sleep and your baby will spend less time in REM sleep than they did as a newborn.
Should I intervene or let them be?
This question is truly the crux of the issue. As new parents, it can feel very confusing when your newborn is loud and moving around. You may feel like you need to rush over and tend to them. Some parents worry that if they don’t quickly quiet their newborn, then their newborn will be awake for hours- and who can blame them! I know sleep is hard to come by and feels so elusive during those first few months.
However, knowing what you now know about active sleep, you can see how rushing over to “help” may actually do the opposite of what you’re hoping it will. You may accidentally wake your newborn up who was really sleeping, even though they didn’t sound like it. Also, if your goal is to quiet your newborn down as they are sleeping, that just may not be possible as their active sleep is not supposed to be quiet. Your patting, rocking, and replacing the pacifier won’t necessarily hush them and you don’t want them to skip over that stage of REM sleep anyways.
Now, I’m not saying that you can’t go to your newborn in the night when you hear them. But I am encouraging you to pause and listen when you hear your newborn. Give them a minute or two so you can discern if they are truly awake and distressed or if they are possibly still asleep. If you can see their face and know that their eyes are closed, that can also help you to realize they aren’t awake and crying because they need something- they are asleep and crying because that’s what happens sometimes in REM!
When you wait, oftentimes you’ll realize that they aren’t actually awake and they’ll stay asleep without any intervention (however noisy that sleep may be). This also means that when they wake up more naturally later they will probably wake up and be in a better mood than the times you’ve accidentally woken them up in the middle of REM sleep.
As you spend more and more time with your newborn, you’ll also learn to discern their different sounds and cries. You’ll soon learn that not every fuss or cry is a sound of distress. And as you start to pause more at night, you’ll grow more and more confident in doing that. Start small and work your way up as you feel comfortable.
More newborn sleep resources
If you like what you’ve read here, I’ve got several other newborn sleep blogs that might interest you:
Should I swaddle my baby for better sleep?
Contact naps in the newborn stage
Managing the witching hour with your newborn
Implementing an easy to follow bedtime routine for your newborn
How to go from contact naps to crib naps
How to drop the swaddle for sleep
Final thoughts
Navigating your newborn’s sleep patterns can feel like a mystery, especially when they seem so restless during sleep. But now you know that active sleep is a normal and important part of their development. Those little twitches, noises, and movements are just your baby’s way of getting the rest they need to grow and thrive.
Remember, if your newborn seems fidgety during sleep, it’s usually best to let them be. Over time, you’ll become more familiar with their unique sleep cues and learn when they truly need you.
If you’re still feeling unsure or if sleep struggles are taking a toll on your household, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. As a pediatric sleep consultant, I’m here to support you through this journey and provide expert guidance to help your baby—and you—get the rest you deserve!
